TRUST ISSUES

These walls close in around me sliding ever closer but still clear, as if I could move right through them like wind through the waves in your hair. Holding me in as if for evaluation, analysis, suffocation... I feel exposed. Your walls fall away as soon as I realize that it is I who has put them up, and suddenly I am as vulnerable as a nesting bird, no longer secure in my nest. Stockholm syndrome kicks in and now I want those men in white coats back. Off and on, I sleep fitfully, and as I do I remember all the reasons I don't, can't, won't, shouldn't, wouldn't even if I could trust you. And when I do awake those thoughts and words form the monoliths that now rise around me in the form of tea, and type, and work, and silk. Leave me in peace, I say, please, and realize that the walls I once feared have become my cocoon.